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Feeling Vunerable

This topic contains 2 replies, has 2 voices, and was last updated by  Rainbow 8 months, 3 weeks ago. This post has been viewed 385 times

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  • #2827

    Rainbow
    Moderator

    Hi everyone,
    I just want to say I lost my father a few weeks before Christmas. He was 93 years old and the prostate cancer he had 30 odd years ago came back in his bones and caused him a lot of pain during the last few weeks of his life. It was very diificult for me as he lived in Alberta, Canada while I live in the south of England. I could not be there to support him or my three sisters and two brothers and I felt bad about this. But I could not leave my wife alone to see him as she has a lot of health problems herself. We only managed to spend a month together getting to know each other 24 years ago but I do miss being able to phone him up. As I am now the oldest member of my family now, it has not only made me feel vunerable but also made me so aware of the need to enjoy the time we have.Thank you for taking the time to read this.

    #3029

    NeedToTalk
    Participant

    I’m very sorry to hear about your loss. I also suffered the same about the same time and understand the feeling of vulnerability. I  Hope you feel stronger now though as I do? It is shocking when you have that person there to talk to you and guide you and then they suddenly are not there…. No matter how long you know they are going to die it is still a shock. My heart goes out to you. Please let me know you are feeling stronger… I hope you have someone to talk to? I find it helps to write things down and get things off your chest. I feel lots of things weren’t right too but when I hear of other people’s sadness I realise I’m not alone. It sounds to me though that you did the utmost best considering your circumstances. You are a lovely person for having those feelings but it’s not fair to beat yourself up about not being able to do more. . yes, you’re right you should enjoy the time you have and make as much happiness as possible for those around you.

    #3045

    Rainbow
    Moderator

    Hi,

    Thank you for the reply nd your kind words. Sorry for not replying sooner. Yes I am feeling stronger now.  I have also learned recently I have also lost an Uncle who also lived in Canada and who also died from prostate cancer. I would seem prostate cancer runs strongly in our family as I also had it about six years ago. But I found it a life changing experiance and believe me, it has changed me for the better. I thought I used to appreciate life before I was diagnosed but now my appreciation leve has shot through the roof. It has changed me in many ways and I am now doing things I would never have done before. I  always believed that often something good comes out of something bad and it has certainly happened in my case.

    I hope you are also feeling stronger now. I often say to people, we never really get over losing someone we love for our loss leaves a big hole in our lives; but in time we do get used to a differnt way of life. We will always miss them but they would want us to get on with our lives. Take care my friend, Rainbow.

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